i'm just a human being

tahu

2011-11-24T09:17:00.000-08:00

aku jumpa ini di suatu pagi

sekiranya ada diantara kamu 20 org yg sabar, nescaya mereka dpt menewaskan 200 dan sekiranya di antara kamu
ada 100 org yg sabar, nescaya mekera dapat menewaskan 1000 orang kafir, disebabkan mereka (yg kafir itu)
org yg tidak mengerti.

sekarang Allah meringankn kepadamu krn dia mengetahui padamu ad kelemahan. oleh itu, sekiranya ada diantara kamu 100
org yg sabar, nescaya mereka dpt menewaskan 200 org dan sekiranya ada diantara kamu 1000 org, nescaya mereka dpt
menewaskan 2000 org dgn izin allah.
dan allah beserta org yg sabar.

ini ucapan rasulullah saw sblm perang badar..

bace semula rangkap pertama itu, 1 mampu memenangi 10, kerana mereka itu tidak mengerti.
mengerti tntg apa? tntg hidup dan tujuannya brg kali..

tp hari ini tidak begitu lg.. kita yg seakan2 tdk mengerti.. lihat saja penulisan mereka tntg hidup..
tntg cinta.. penuh dgn makna.. kita? hanya tahu 'allah jdkan manusia dan jin utk beribadah'
tp tidak mengerti satu apapun tntg itu.. tntg hidup..

ilmu itu makna.. selain itu maklumat.. al-quran yg kita baca, hanya akn jadi ilmu sekiranya kita cari dn jumpa maknanya..
jika tidak.. kitab agung itu cuma maklumat..

btul kau kata mereka hanya hidup untuk dunia.. sungguh kau tiada salah tntg itu..
tp tafsiran mereka tntg hidup mereka yg 1 itu jauh lebih dalam dari tafsiran hidup kita yg 2..
kita cuma tahu kita punyai duniawi, dan ukhrawi.. tnpa pengisian..
kita cuma tahu jdkn kehidupan ukhrawi sbgi alasan utk gagal duniawi..
malang sggh kita.. nmpk sabar sggh org yg begitu bkn?

tp fahamilah itu bkn sabar..
itu bkn golongan 'org yg sabar' yg dimaksudkan rasulullah
ak tdk menulis ini bkn utk menyatakan ak sudah thu erti hidup.. ak juga masih mencari.. jauh lg perjalananku..
ak mahu mengajak kamu mencari bersama.. supaya kita dpt jd 'org yg sabar' itu..

anology hidup pensel kayu

2011-11-09T02:02:00.000-08:00

byk anologi yg kite bole buat tntg hidup ni..
tp ak pling suke yg ni..

hidup ni mcm pensel kayu yg ade pemadam kt hujung lg satu
biar luar tu buruk.. jgn matenye..
bile kite tulis.. mesti ade silap.. tp kite diberi peluang untuk 'padam'kn
kite 'tumpul' jugk lambat laun.. so kne 'asah'.. sakit bile 'asah'.. tp tu yg kite perlu lalu untuk jd 'tajam' balik..
kite akn diasah smpi kite dh tk cukup pnjg utk digune..
jd gunelah mate tu untuk tulis yg elok2..

sekian

to express or to suspend?

2011-10-26T11:10:00.000-07:00

assalamualaikum

its been quite a while since i last wrote something here..

well not bcoz i dont have anything to write, but if u read all my post, i question things, so for the past few months, it seem like all my questions seem to have an answer.. its either that or im just lazy to write.. :)

the latest question.. to speak, or not to speak(good things)

it is clear cut that rasulullah saw said that if dont have anything good to say, dont say anything.. simple.. precise..

here's the thing, u have something good to say, express it or keep it to yourself?
kindda silly to ask
u may be thinking 'if its a good thing, just say it la'
yes it is but not quite..

one thing i know, when we talk, others dont, thus we can only listen to ourself.
its nothing bad, but i think its a pity..
coz u have the chance to get any new input..

there's always next time u might think.. true.. absolutely.. im not going to write about 'u dont even know if u have the next second' type of argument here, instead, i like to invite u to reflect on any group of friends u have.
ask this: who usually talks the most?

most likely its the same person each time..

my point is that if u talk once, u'll do most of the talking. even if there is a next time, it'll be u again. thus u wont have the chance to listen.

to me the chance to listen is magical. especially if u have the chance to listen to someone that doesnt talk that much. u'll be surprise.

a friend who does not really seems to be very pious can be the one who define the most complex topic to us, who make sense about things that barely make any.

another prospect is giving advice.. we tend give it too soon.. way too soon..
i always believe that there's reasons for every choice that a particular person made.
i really things that it is an act of disrespect if u say that his or her choice is wrong without hearing the reasons behind it.

still it is a choice, yours for u, mine for me, it might be different, but im sure there's a reason behind ur choice that i should respect. so go on, if u think expressing is better. 'khilaf is a blessing' rasulullah saw once said. :)
im not writing this to promote my choice, or to chance the choices u have made, im just inviting u to think.

a balance between both migth be the best option.. but where is the midpoint? can u point it?

p/s: im talking about choices regarding subjective matter, i.e non-obligatory

being ambitious

2011-07-10T19:18:00.000-07:00

ambitious

we all know what this word is all about.. the bigger the better..
not trying to change that, coz all successes starts with an ambition.. no ambition, no success. simple.

so what's wrong here?

nothing is wrong, but i want to invite u to think about something..

when ure being ambitious, u want something. when u want something, u dont want that something else.

in short ambitious is directly proportional to wanting something, and not wanting that something else..

here comes the issue.. when u r being too ambitious, not wanting that something else has become hating that something else and everything that is attached to it.

here's an example: u want to live in a château so bad to the point where u hate those who live in a flat appartent.

dont blame ambition on this.. its not the guilty party.. i really dont think that being ambitious is wrong.. even if ure being too ambitious, i still dont think its wrong..

but it became a problem when u hate everything that is attached to that something else.. coz u really shouldnt..

go and find a way to still be ambitious without hating the things attached to that something else

but here r some suggestions:

we all want to win, we all hate to lose..
hate losing, dont hate the loosers..

aku mahu berbicara tentang sabar

2011-05-16T17:27:00.000-07:00

sabar..
kite sume tahu kepentingn sabar..
dn aku tk nk cerite pn psl kepentingn sabar ni..

aku cume nk ubah ape yg aku rase sbgi slh fhm tntg sbr ni..

sabar itu bkn tidak berbuat ape2

ak tk ckp yg kite kne pukul balik org yg pukul kite

tp ak ckp psl musibah yg dtg kerana kite

results exam tk power.. kite ckp 'sabar la'
bg ak yg kurg ilmu ni.. tu bkn sabar cik adik oi..
itu putus ase! nk kasar lg kufur!

sbbnye ko mmpu usehe tp ko tk usehe pn

ko accident sbb ko bawak laju.. time ko kt hospital ko ckp 'sabar, ini kn musibah'
tu bukan musibah der.. tu cari pasal.. yg ko ptut ckp bkn sabar, tp pdn muke..
dn itu juge bukn sabar.. sbb klu ko sabar ko tk speeding pn..

ade bnde psl organisasi yg ko tk puas ati..
ko akn ckp mls a nk complain.. nnt jwpnnye same jugk 'sabar la'
baik ak diam je.. diam tu kn sabar..

ko mmg amat pandai!!

klu sume org dlm aircraft industry adelah org cm ko.. ak tk naik kpl terbang la cite die.. aku naik kpl terbang sbb aku tahu terbang adelah salah satu transport yg paling selamat. knp paling selamat?
sbb diorg akn improve safety setiap kali lps ade aircrash.

klu sume org dlm aircraft industry tu bersabar seperti kau bersabar..
setiap kali crash.. 'sabar la, dh takdir'
skali lg aku ulang.. itu bukan sabar, itu putus ase!!

penyiasatan, pelaburan, kajian, dan tindakan yg diambil selepas aircrash tu, itu barulah sabar namenye.. sbb mcm2 diorg kne buat

same a cm klu kite cube improve results exam kite.. kne tmbh mse blaja ke, tuka care blaja ke.. byk bnde kn kne buat.. itu bru ujian.. nk lalu ujian tu kne sabar..
tk buat ape2 itu bukan sabar..

berbalik pd organisasi pulak.. klu ko diam je.. mmg tkkn improve a organisasi ko..
tp igt.. bkn ak tulis ni nk bg ko lesen nk maki hamun org dlm organisasi tu..
sbb itu pn bkn sabar.. tu terburu-buru namenye.. bincang la elok2.. klu agak2 time tu ko tk bole nk bincang elok2 sbb ko tgh emo.. ko ilek a dulu.. dh agk2 rasional br a discuss.. sbb kn ak dh tulis kt atas tu.. nk improve it lg ssh, n perlukn sabar.. tk buat ape2 tk perlukn ape2 pn..

dn ko still nk istilahkn tk buat ape2 itu sabar??

aku tulis ni bkn nk menidakkan ilmu sesiape.. mintk maaf la klu ade sesiape yg rse cmtu.. ak cume nk invite korg utk fikir psl ni..

moge bermanfaat

aku juga

2011-05-13T10:21:00.000-07:00

aku juga separti kamu
tidak sempurna, penuh cacat cela
aku juga seperti kamu
selalu berdosa pada yang maha Esa
aku juga seperti kamu
ada kala hebat, ada kala tidak
aku juga seperti kamu
selalu lupa bersyukur, selalu pula kufur
aku juga seperti kamu
ada jatuh, ada bangun
aku juga seperti kamu
masih lagi mencari diri
aku juga seperti kamu
masih ada dosa yang belum mampu aku buang
aku juga seperti kamu..

jika aku seperti kamu, kenapa perlu aku tulis?
kenapa perlu aku beri tahu ang kita serupa?

kerna aku ingin ajak kamu, kau, aku, kita, dia, mereka untuk tidak putus asa

apa kau tengah repekkan ini?
putus asa dari apa?

putus asa dengan Tuhan!
ramai aku dengar
kiri, kanan, depan, belakang
begitu ramai yang melafaz
aku tidak baik, sudah tiada harapan

sungguh, jgn begitu..
Tuhan itu tidak seperti aku, kau kita, dia, mereka
yang mudah jelek memberi ampun
tidak.. Tuhan jauh dari itu

jangan putus asa sahabat
jangan putus asa kawan
jangan putus asa

jangan biar aku sendirian meminta
jangan biar aku sendirian meminta
jangan biar aku sendirian meminta

jika kau fikir kau idak lagi punya harapan..

ingat..

aku juga seperti kamu

judge, judging, judgement

2011-04-28T19:29:00.000-07:00

this post is not about judgement day.. (in case anybody is wondering)

not so recently i watched this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXzUuKdfnRE

one of the lady said: i would like u to judge me based on who i am, and what i do, not on the way i look.

so hijab has become a method to free themselves from physical judgement. they feel FREE, LIBERATED.

but unfortunately that does not happen in malaysia

girls are judged by their hijab.

nmpk je budak tudung labuh, kite ckp baik

klu tudung takat bawal 45, kite ckp biase je.

pki je tdg.. perangai taik..

tk pakai.. well u get my point

so hijab is not as liberating here in malaysia as it is in north america, or europe. it seems so demanding.

still, it is not an excuse not to wear them, or not to wear them properly.

for the public: this 'judging based on hijab size' activities has to stop.

for the girls: pakai la btul2.. kn bnde tu allah ske.. sume org pn ske..

in a nutshell: dont keep urself bz screaming at people.
if ure 'the girls', say this 2 urselves: i am wrong, no wonder they're mad
if ure 'the public' say this 2 urselves: i should stop judging, no wonder they dont want to wear it.

islam should liberates all of us. so let it.

appreciation

2011-04-10T10:14:00.000-07:00

assalamualaikum

we are all different..
thus we appreciate different things
some might say linkin park is rubbish..
some might say they are inspirational..
its what we all call subjective matter..
and all over the world we listen to people say about embracing the difference..

but do we?
do we really embracing it?

maybe this can ring some bell in those thick skull of ours:
the topic of religious related culture..
blurry?
try these:

how many times we simply label people as 'tkde adab' when that people say things that against our understanding

how many times we force people to look at a certain things the way we do just because
we are on the right side ie the religious side
eg: the topic of aurat

how many times we say someone as 'aqidah tk kuat' when that individual ask questions that u dont dare to ask (or maybe we just not smart enough to think about it)

for u who read this post might think i have something against this religious side, no i dont.

all im trying to say is,even if what u're saying is the absolute truth, it does not give u the right to say it to their face and hurting them.
unless all u care is delivering the facts.

facts need to be delivered, i understand that.
but facts is not some DHL parcel that u have to deliver as soon as possible.

my suggestion is, understand that person first. do not say anything from ur side until u really understand them. then make them think. let them ask, only then u deliver the facts.
if they dont ask. it just not the time yet.

they may not ask u again. but if they care enough about it, they will look for the answer elsewhere.

it takes time. it is painfully slow. thats why Allah really love those who are patience i guess (trying to be one)

assalamualaikum

when the wing stalls

2011-03-09T17:20:00.000-08:00

u learned: life is a test.. it will be hard.. all that good stuff

u dig it through that thick skull of yours..
understand it.. believe it..

u developed tis sort of confidence that u will never be sad again..

really?

unfortunately knowing this does not break your fall..

it does not change the value of G ie 9.81 m/s^2

you will still attain the terminal velocity if you're high enough..

i guess it really is a test

conclusion: make your own

questions?

2010-11-30T07:37:00.000-08:00

some of us ask ourselves, some dont..
but how many of us ask twice?
or how many question the motive of: why we search for the answer in the first place?

confused? sorry.. let me try to untangle some..

we do something,anything for that matter
those who ask will ask themselves: why did i do that
we try and try to justify our doings.

but how many of us ask twice?
how many of us ask why we justify our doings?
to feel safe maybe?
to feel right?

we try time and time to explain our doings..
again i ask: why is that?
coz t does not actually feel right?
are we actually trying to trick our heart with our brains?
perhaps..

now, if u decide that we are tricking our hearts to accept your actions..
what's next?
is it wrong to trick our hearts?

God ask us to check back, i know.
God ask us to judge our day.
but here we are, telling ourselves that we did good.
perhaps to get a better sleep.

but is it parallel with the purpose of muhasabah?

decide for yourself
not trying to bring any guilt
simply writing down my thoughts..

percaya vs mempercayakan diri

2010-10-31T05:43:00.000-07:00

dgr cite ni mase tazkirah lps maghrib 31/10/10
credit: ustaz zulfadhli (maaf ustz klu salah eja)

wakil dari 10 negara mengambil bahagian dalam satu pertandingan
pertandingannya berbentuk: menyeberangi satu air terjun yang tinggi dengan berjalan di atas seutas tali.
no safety net*

ditakdirkan 9 peserta pertama jatuh dan mati.
tiba giliran peserta terakhir.
beliau berjaya melepasi air terjun tersebut, tapi tiada seorang pun yang bersorak meraikan kejayaannya.
kehairanan, dia pun bertanya "mengapa kamu tidak bersorak meraikan kejayaanku?"
"kamu hanya bernasib baik", balas penonton.
"jika aku melakukannya sekali lagi, adakah kamu akan percaya pada kebolehanku?" tanya si penyeberang
"ya" balas penonton.

maka diseberanginya air terjun itu sekali lagi, dan bersoraklah semua penonton.
"percayakah kamu semua dengan kebolehanku?" tanya beliau.
"ya!!!" teriak penonton.

kemudian peserta tersebut menanyakan kepada penonton sesiapa yang sukarela didokong oleh peserta itu untuk menyeberangi air terjun tersebut.
*senyap*

peserta it bertanya,"bukankah kamu semua berkata kamu percaya dengan kebolehanku?"
*masih senyap*

kemudian bersuara seorg budak "saya!!!!!"

lalu dia pun didokongi peserta itu ke seberang air terjun.

sejurus selepas diturunkan, ramai yang bertanya kepada budak itu mengapa dia sanggup didokong sedangkan orang lain mendiamkan diri.

adik itu menjawab,"saya mempercayakan diri saya kepada jagoh itu"

p/s: betapa ramai kita pada hari ini percaya pada Allah tetapi tidak lagi mempercayakan diri padaNya. reminder for the bloke typing this, n whoever wants to be reminded

clash of the titans: part 2

2010-10-08T07:58:00.000-07:00

bad feeling vs good thought.. again..
epic battle..

collateral damage: the soul i.e: very disturbed

idealistically depressing..

2010-10-06T22:32:00.000-07:00

just finish reading a friend's blog when i'm writing this..
(not the entire blog mind u)

read a few posts..
the theme of those posts were: the dream guy. or it's how i saw it al least (appologise to the writer if i saw it not the way it should)

after reading those posts, say to myself: is that what they really hope in a man? its just way, way too ambitious.. well for obvious reasons..

milliseconds after that thought, i do not know how many million neurons worked to come up with the next thought: u're just scared, coz u r a long way from those men in the posts, aren't u?

honest answer: i am scared..

but not bcoz i'm not like those men, instead is bcoz i hate to disappoint..
* if that the kind of men they want, im not able to match it. thus, shattering a dream.

another cynical thought: u wont b able to match it or just simply dont want to?

this one, is a very hard question..

the real question that needs to be asked: am i using the term 'idealistic' as an excuse not to change myself?

not quite sure yet.

let me turn the table for once: how many time we use a term as an excuse?
ask real hard.

about pulling the trigger

2010-10-04T10:29:00.000-07:00

i'm not known for a high level of patience.. i.e: im reckless.

reckless in my judgement, in my choice of words.. all of it..
paid some price for that in the past..

it's just hard not to pull the trigger when u have a really good tone..

i mean..
if u r somewhere, with someone who is doing a wrong thing (any kind of wrong),
its hard to just ignore it.
hard to keep urself from giving a cynical smile, let alone a shake of the head.
u wont be able to understand them.. coz ure too bz judging n punishing..

u probably saying, they did wrong, they deserve those treatment as a punishment..

not quiet people,

they need help, n those treatment is not doing them any good..

i knew this, a so does most of u..

but like i said.. its hard not to pull the trigger..

mujahadah.key.hard.

terrible

2010-09-19T11:00:00.000-07:00

it feels terrible..
it feels like..
i'm flying..
its a dark night..
lost my bearing..
lost my altimeter..
lost my gyro..
without power..
without radio..
just doomed..

dont know what i should do
dont even know what i want to

just numb

when u can do what u want but u cant do nothing

2010-09-17T18:40:00.000-07:00

very ironic right??
picture this..
u r piloting an aircraft,
moonless night.
instrument all gone wrong; speedometer, altimeter, gyro. all of them.
u can look but u see nothing
u can feel but in a sense u're numb
u can hear but u heard nothing

'when u can do what u want but u cant do nothing'
so, so lost

what r we fighting for??

2010-09-17T18:07:00.001-07:00

what on earth r we fighting for??
we fight to say he's wrong when both could be right
we fight to say we're right when both could be wrong
we say god knows everything but we talk as if we're god
shoving people
shutting people
stump people
with quranic verse and sunnah
as if we know everything
but yet u said it out loud that only god knows everything
get my point about 'talking as if we're god'?
i wrote this to remind whoever wants to be reminded
as a checklist for whoever wants to check
not trying to be a captain ordering crews on deck
just trying to remind us to look back

now ask urself: what r we fighting for?

consistency

2010-08-01T08:56:00.000-07:00

con.sist.en.cy: the state of always being the same in standard, form, behaviour etc*
taken from: the oxford dictionary of current english for malaysian students

i'm writing about consistency within human.
who on the face of planet earth does not like this value in a person?
i would like to think there isn't any, coz this is among the top values in my list.

think about something that makes u happy for a moment. :)

now think about the following:
-a 'person' that doesn't do what he preaches
-a 'person' that fine about something on one day, but angry about it on another

now think back about the things that makes u happy.. :)

now lets ask ourselves this: am i the 'person'?

ask real hard

have u ever say 'x never try to do anything, there is just no effort' but u yourself never did try to wear the hijab for instance?

or saying 'i dont care what people gonna say' when wearing a tight outfit but worrying so much about what people gonna say when u do not conduct yourself as u should when u wear a hijab?

ask these kind of questions really hard.
on different subjects as well.

if u r the 'person', hate that person!

n believe u have the power to chance.
begin now. do not delay.

p/s: i chose the aurat as the example subject coz the issues is so critical right now, n i'm really bothered with it. really, really bothered.

sumpah aku nyampah ngn org kemaruk..

2010-07-28T06:12:00.000-07:00

he's my everything
chentaku
aku dan dia
jodoh anda org negeri X: tepat skali.. die mmg dr
jgn rindu2 ye syg

n ntah pae lagi diorg tulis..
siyes nyampah bhai..
ko cm dh confirm2 je ko kawin ngn die..
ko cite ape ni?? ko idup lagi esok pn blom tntu..
yg ko galabah2 ckp die jodoh ko bagai pehal..

muak tau
MUAK

tolong a..

yg lagi aku nyampah bile break nangis.. cm ape je..
pastu sumpah seranah ex tu..

bapak sedih idup ko..

pastu cite menyesal.. tk nk caye laki bagai.. 3 bln lg ko couple baru..

ape la yg ngarut sgt ni..
pastu cycle tu ulang balik..
ko ni.. cm tin aluminium ko tau.. kne recycle...

siyes sedih tgk ko..

harap allah bg a kt ko hidayah.. atau pn kasi ko cpt kawin..

the answer u give..

2010-07-05T07:40:00.000-07:00

this post will be about dakwah..
i know i'm not the best man to talk about this..

it wont be a statement.. i'll try to make it more of a question to be answered together..

when someone comes to u and ask tough, very tough questions
question like: why must we pray 5 times a day.. those kind.. u know right?

we often heard people answer that kind of questions with the hikmah of doing the deeds..

i'm a nobody to say this is a wrong answer..
the person answering those surely have reasons for their answer.. all respect remains..

i'm just trying to bring a new perspective here.. evoking some creative thoughts..

answering those question with the hikmah will cause a confusion between asbab and hikmah, dont u think?

i read a post about asbab and hikmah..
asbab is always: lillah hi ta'alaa..
hikmah can be anything good u can think off..

not excact words*

that's all for this time.. check back ur answer.. :)

p/s: nobody is wrong.. dont get me wrong

subjective stuff.. bla.. bla..

2010-07-02T04:24:00.000-07:00

subjective: means that neither are wrong nor right..

we all know his right..
thats y the 'bla.. bla' was in the post title

as always, the question: y when u think about he subjective stuff u did, or say, or whatever verb it was, u will ask: did i do the right thing?

i'm not saying its bad for u to check back what u did..

i'm just saying that: maybe a different question need to be asked.

if a different question is needed.. then: what is the question?

i'm searching it myself..
but i'm having a general idea: was the objective accomplished?

but bare in mind: the objective have to be a complete one, i.e considering all factors..

hope everybody finds their new question.

pride.. not u? think back..

2010-06-24T09:23:00.000-07:00

honestly.. i hate the fact that people taking pride in big spending wedding..

i maen.. if u want o show ur love o ur beloved wife.. then just show it to her.. y bother with the world?

ask urself this: y do i spend it here. WHAT DO I WANT FROM IT?
*of course u need to be honest answering that*

i did not wrote u cannot spend.. its ur money.. but y want to spend all on that one day? save some and buy a car or a house sounds much more realistic to me..

i dont mind if u want to spend if u have money..
but if u have to delay ur wedding just to save money.. that is just ridiculous..
just unthinkably unreasonable..

forgive the negative comment but that is just what i think..

lets think back: we want to live a happy life forever.. sounds familiar?
we all know money is important.. so y dont spend it on the happy life u wanted so bad?

all i can say is that y go such a great length to show off??
if u r bruce wayne that's a different story..

so i told myself.. i will try my best to eliminate every source of pride on my wedding day..

but another part of me suddenly asked: u hated pride so much, but wont eliminating the source of pride be the source of pride itself??

i cant answer that for the time being. the niat need to be rechecked to answer that..

do u hide behind ur words?

2010-06-21T06:35:00.000-07:00

last post i wrote about how true u r to ur words..
this time its a bit different.. not much though..

aku tk hebat..
aku bukan star..
aku tk mampu..
n many more..

sounds familiar??

we, at least i, heard these a lot.. even used it before.. many, many times.

here comes the question: how many times these statement is used to to tell the truth?

u might answer: it is the truth, i'm no star n all..

my second question: how many times, u, or we rather, used these as an excuse? excuse to run away? run away from responsibilities? responsibilities towards the failures we encounter?

why it is so hard to say: i'm no good, YET. and i'll be better
why it is so easy to say: i'm no good, that's y i fail.

from what i can see, we r just scared. scared to fall twice. that's y after the first fall, we dont get back up. we tell people that we r no good, so that people dont expect anything from us. no more failure, even when it means no more success!!

that's what i think.. i'll let u ask urself. n think of an answer of ur own.. i already have mine..

2 sides of the same coin

2010-06-11T00:00:00.000-07:00

people hv tendency, preference, regardless weather u r the observer or the participant in the particular situation..

let me elaborate, or try rather.

setiap imam perlukan ma'mum, dn setiap ma'mun perlukn imam

every general needs an army, n every army need a general

look at these sentences..
an example of 2 sides of the same coin.
the values are identical.
but the sides r different.

so next time.. when u listen or read about someone, dont just listen or read his words, probe deeper, listen or read his values.

coz all this value come from somthing i call 'ilham'
n we all know this 'ilham' came from Allah.

only the method god use to convey usually differs.
some get it from books, some get it from the quran, the origin cn b anywhere.

now if u r the observer, u now know the value of the coin.
so, which side would prefer to look at? coz u cant look at both at the same time.

then ask urself this: y did i prefer that side?
this question will answer which image u attach to which group of people. the good thing is that after answering this question, u will realise that the attachment is just an attachment. u wont be judgmental, or prejudice.

u r free. :)

how true r u about ur words?

2010-06-10T08:22:00.000-07:00

i was imagining i found a solution to a problem.. (aircraft design issues)
then it was sharing it..

then someone that i share it with, asked me: y do u share this?

i kept the answer to myself, instead i answered him with a question: y not?

then he said: other people will have the solution without thinking, thats not fair, is it?

despite all the down side about sharing about it, somehow u (in this case me) choose to..

the question is: the reason, is it really u or just an image u try to project?

i dont mean that u cant change urself, or be better, or try to be better.. but ikhlas..

did not make the cut

2010-06-06T21:17:00.000-07:00

still too weak!!

have to become stronger, better!!

God give me strength!!!

really need it and i believe it can only come from u

who's right?

2010-05-31T07:30:00.000-07:00

there is just way too many wrongs wherever u turn ur head..

it has become normal to do wrong

the problem is not about the doers or the doings

it's about when u demands for rights

u will be accused to be:

too demanding
not realistic
intimidating
unforgiving

n the list of titles goes on

but i'm going to stay where i'm at
telling the truth n take no prisoner style..

wrong is still wrong, right is still right..
u can ask for time to change, but no excuse not to change.
coz it is not my standard, its God's.
i cant play with that standard.

clash of the titans

2010-05-27T08:14:00.000-07:00

dont even know how to put it in words..

one thing is definite the titans r still fighting an epic war..

it is so hard to describe

the titans are actually thoughts, contradict thoughts..

God, help me solve this please.

questions

2010-05-19T05:28:00.000-07:00

a lot in my head right now
but unfortunately without answer

will keep searching

what i call 'hard work"

2010-05-01T10:23:00.000-07:00

brandon roy
guard
portland trailblazers

i choose not to talk about allen iverson coz i dont know his shooting training regime

back to roy

as a shooting guard.. he shoots a lot..
in the 09-10 regular season he averages 21.5 points per game
with 47.3% shooting
his field goal made to attempt is 491:1,038
he played 65 games this regular season
which means he shoots an average of 16.96 shots per game

but his training??
700 shots!! every training sessions!!

he only uses 2.28% of that attempts!!

do more.
now that's HARD WORK

jangan sengaja butakan mata

2010-04-19T21:18:00.000-07:00

"ko pehal?? mcm tkde org lain ko nk tego!! aku gk kene.."

"sume pn pki cmni ape.."

ni la reply2 standard, blom tune lagi, yg korg akn dpt klu try nk betulkn org lain..
ni pn blom msk lg reply2 klu org yg ko tgo tu tau psl zmn jahiliah ko..
jenuh2~~

yg aku pelik tu.. tau bnde tu slh.. ok fine yg bg kemampuan nk tgglkn of course Allah yg maha satu.. tp Allah suro kite usehe.. tk tau la korg nye pendapat.. tp klu ko tgh couple, ko still pgg tgn.. tu usehe ke?? blom pn suro break lagi..

ni giliran reply yg kedue tu plk..
sdgkn dr nabi adam, sampai manusie terakhir pn Allah bole kumpulkn kt padang masyar tu.. ape ko pikir Allah tk mampu nk sumbat sume masuk nerake??

ko ckp mcm nerake bole penuh je.. "sume pki cmni" ko ckp cmtu mase allah tanye..
ni bkn SPM la graf bole turun..

aku tk sangkal yg hidayah tu milik mutlak Allah..
hati kite pn Die yg pegang..

tp hidayah tu kne mintak..
bab ni aku sure sume bwt.. bab doa2 ni sume tip top

tp bile org tgo tu bkn hidayah??
yg tu gi tolak knp?? ko dh mintk pastu tolak.. pekil2 je..

fine, aku tgo care salah.. tu salah aku.. salah ko plk?
tu pn kne fikir gk.. tp ko ckp plk "slh aku ak tau la"

tau pulak.. haih~~

tau tp tk usehe menjauhi..

aku ckp USEHE.. bkn TGGLKN..

aku fhm rmi bwt.. aku tau ssh nk tgglkn.. tp still kne USEHE.. sbb hidup ni pn bkn milik kite..

HARD WORK!!!!!

i aint holding back this time

2010-04-06T05:27:00.000-07:00

i'm angry, frustrated, and all the negative feeling u can think of.

to be honest.. i'm happy when my friends' relationship went wrong.
wanna know y? coz for an extended period they will stop doing all those lovey dovey stuff, thus stop putting in deposit in their sin account..

i'm also happy when they said they had enough of it and won't be doing it anymore due to the frustration: the only time i actually appreciate frustration. ironic.

but unfortunately, all those buggers get back to it in a few months time. their happy. for sure they r. but hell i'm not. look at what u just said!! 'had enough' soooo f***ing true man. -i said i aint holding back

y is it so so damn hard to hold on to ur own words man.. u said u're trying.. i aint seeing any results. i aint listening to the 'u dont know everything' excuse anymore.
u said it aint fair, but i dint ask u to become 'aishah' overnight!!
what i expect to see is constant improvement, i understand there will be slip up.

but u r asking me to tolerate the same slip up, the one that i've talk to u about, n u promised me to work on it. but nothing seems to chance!! what the hell?!!

what is wrong with u?!!
what does u want?!!

what i wanna do is give up on u.
coz u doesnt seem to need me around.. what i said doesnt change u.

i talked to u about those picture..
u said thats old.. i accepted it..
then ur new ones still a brows raiser..
dont u listen??!!

tell me which parents wont raise their brows seeing that???
yours??
his??
hers??

i can 'really' comprehend that the attention u get and the approval from the comments is far, far more important than ur promise.. sure does..

i had enough with u.. u frustrates me..

p/s: but it wont be fair to give up. thus conflicting emotions inside me

when ur fastest is just not fast enough

2010-03-14T10:58:00.000-07:00

u set ur mind..
u trained hard..
u learned..
u pushed..

the time comes.

on ur mark:
u settle yourself on the block..

get set:
u press on the block..

pow!!
u lift..
u lean forward.. head down..
10 small steps.. 10 metres
chest up.. lift.. drive.. 50 metres..
head up.. lift.. lift..
finish line in sight..
push!!
the final dip..

then u hear someone says: its not quick enough..

u look around.. no one look at u in the eyes..
all with either their head down or hands on their faces..
frustration written all over..
u can almost taste their frustration from the air u breath..
then they come to u and said: never mind, u did ur best..

but that does not take away the frustration from their face does it??

it taste everything but great to disappoint the one u love..
really..

cerite pasal kaki kiri..

2010-03-08T08:00:00.000-08:00

jangan sesekali kite pndng rendah kaki kiri orang..
walau pun dh 100 kali die miss ngn kaki kiri die..
sbb shot yg ke 101 tkde kene mengene...
rezeki shot tu dh tertulis..

dr kewujudan kaki kiri tu dh kire rezeki..
kenen ke tk..gol ke tk.. apetah lagi kn..

so knp la nk tkot sgt nnk hayun kaki kiri tu..

ak tulis ni bkn la nk ckp kaki kiri aku gempak..
ade gk sepak tk kene kn..

tp aku bersyukur allah izinkn aku hayun..
dn pernah gk la score pki kaki kiri..

bg aku tu tande kesyukurn aku la..
klu gol aku celebrate.. pandang langit sambil bersyukur..
klu tk ak tutup muke.. n still pandang langit..
mintk kekuatan supaye brani cube lagi..

so.. akhir kate.. bak kate ronaldo..
dont just rely on one foot. work on the other..

when u r stretched

2010-02-19T06:23:00.000-08:00

its very hard.. when u no longer have a star to depend on
when u suddenly have to be the star..
being a star is easy.. doing what stars do is not..

especially when u see ur predecessor was defeated.. u start to ask urself..
'am i good enough for that?'

u decide to step up.. in other words u choose to battle..
is tiring when u feel like u r the only one who's fighting..
when others just walk around with smiles..
makes u ask urself another question 'am i doing the right thing?'

indeed u r..

just keep pushing!!

just take this as an injury during training..
or a hard foul..

remember.. 'they ' cant handle u!! that's y 'they' foul u.

an absolute prove that u r getting better!!!

to do next:
-celebrate!!
-set new goals
-push hard.. again.. then harder!!

DONT GIVE UP COZ ALLAH AND RASULULLAH HATE QUITER!!

to what y'all call freedom (think again) [for girls]

2010-02-10T08:39:00.000-08:00

i read one article that make me write this post..

http://iloveallaah.blogspot.com/2010/01/why-are-women-turning-to-islam.html

there's the like.. read it if u want to..

the freedom i want to talk about is the freedom to wear whatever u like..
i just want to say a few things and i want you girls to think about it..
whenever the question 'why so exposed?' is asked, the most common answer is: its warm.

you girls call it freedom, but think about it..

guys want to see it.. you girls show it.. i woundn't call that freedom..
guys in other sense force all of you to wear like that..

you girls really don't mind if a bunch of guys only talk about your asses??
i think y'all do.. everybody does..

i know.. 'hell! that the guys fault for talking about it. not ours'
that's in ur mind now right?

Allah have engineered his masterpiece(us, human), with a special connection between out eyes n our reproductive organs.. thats y He asked us to guard our visions..

i know that the guys have to do the guarding..
but do us some favour aite??
u girls win.. we guys win...
all of us will have some good deeds to help us at 'mahsyar'

think about it..

an analogy..

2009-12-29T07:04:00.000-08:00

let me choose basketball and football for this analogy

basketball:

just imagine.. u came to a new court.. alone.. u have no idea how they play.. they asked u to join them.. u agreed..
the game begins.. u as a point/shooting guard.. felt a bit weird not handling the ball..dont know where to run.. they dont know when to pass.. and so on..but u decided to play shooting guard on that day.. u communicate with the point guard n thing more or less sorted itself..

football:
now imagine.. a new pitch.. totally different style of play..u r a winger.. n they play like chelsea.. how awkward can that be?? but again.. u adjusted.. playing more like a forward.. kind of funny playing football without crossing it..

the common factor for both situation is that u can adjust. why? coz u know the games very well..

now imagine.. the 'adjusting skill is not there'
u constantly out of position.. ur passes r all wrong..
u r not as effective as u know u r capable of..
n feeling u r more of a liability than an asset..
most frustrating is ur team mates threw their hands up in frustration..
unpleasent

here's a catch: u cannot leave the pitch/court/team..
what would u do??

i wish i can be like him (i'm trying)

2009-12-28T09:48:00.000-08:00

he is no other than the one and only rasulullah SAW.
he is THE MAN i look up to..
certainly honoured to be named after him..
the time has come for me to live up to the name..
a tall order to say the least..
but working towards it is a must..
he was a great leader
a great Muslim
a great man
a great friend
a great husband
a great father
a great imam.

more than that, he was described by a walking Quran..
Islam runs through his veins and arteries..
he lived it..
and my pledge is to continue that legacy..
i know it is not going to be easy..
but i must try..

i just hope that the world will except my flaws in trying to be him..
i wont stop!!
insyaallah.. (keeping hopes high)

HOPE

2009-12-12T05:55:00.000-08:00

"Setiap usaha kita dinilai oleh Allah. Allah tidak menilai hasilnya, tapi Allah melihat setiap langkah kita menuju ke arah kebaikan itu. Sebagaimana firman Allah 'Dan orang yang berusaha dengan bersungguh-sungguh kerana memenuhi kehendak Kami, sesungguhnya Kami pimpin mereka ke jalan-jalan Kami (yang menjadikan mereka gembira dan beroleh keredhaan) dan sesungguhnya (pertolongan dan bantuan) Allah berserta orang yang berusaha memperbaiki amalannya,'.
Sememangnya susah untuk melakukan sesuatu yang baik, sebab itu perlunya istiqamah,"

YOU WILL FALL.. JUST GET BACK UP.. AND YOU WILL FALL AGAIN.. GET BACK UP AGAIN..
STAY STRONG.. STAY HOPEFUL..

*reminding myself and whoever choose to be reminded

februari

2009-12-11T23:04:00.000-08:00

FEBUARI
Berfikiran abstrak Sukakan benda yang reality danabstrak Intelligent, bijak dan genius Berpesonaliti yang mudah berubah Mudah menawan orang lain Agak pendiam, pemalu dan rendah diri Jujur dan setia pada segalanya Keras hati untuk mencapai matlamat Tidak suka dikongkong Mudah memberontak apabila dikongkong Suka kegiatan yang lasak Emosinya mudah terluka dan sangat sensitif Mudah mempamerkan marahnya Tidak suka benda yang remeh-temeh Suka berkawan tapi kurang mempamerkannya Sangat berani dan suka memberontak Bercita-cita tinggi dan suka berangan-angan dan ada harapan untuk merealisasikan impiannya Pemerhatian yang tajam Suka hiburan dan sukan Suka benda yang bersifat seni Sangat romantik pada dalaman tetapi tidak pada luaran Berkecenderungan pada benda yang tahyul Amat mudah dan boleh menjadi terlalu boros Belajar untuk mempamerkan emosi.

*sume btl kecuali bab tahyul tu..

p/s:ni kuiz kt facebook

it could have been worse

2009-12-11T04:14:00.000-08:00

i took quite a long walk with my mom from the bus station in front of carrefour subang jaya to SS15 to submit some documents..

during the walk, i reflects back on the difficulties i faced for the past 16+ months..
it was tough. very tough. i was complaining about it actually.

then, me and my mom saw a guy. he got weak knees n have to walk with a supporter. HOW KUFUR I WAS! at least i still can walk normally. can still run..

astagrfirullahal azim..

it could have been worse for me.. so i should be thankful with all i have..
alhamdulillah.. syukran ya Allah..

make good use of your brain

2009-12-09T18:03:00.000-08:00

i was playing futsal late last night. well, we played on an abandoned tennis court with a cone at each end as the goal. hit the cone and you score. so some might want to call it street soccer.. never mind that.. i'm not going to write about the game..

we played using the 'kings stay' rule.. during the time when my team was not on the court, i walked around the court to keep my leg warm.. then i saw a couple just outside the court.. 'nothing' was wrong besides the fact that it was dark there.. then another girl came..

i ignored them as it was my team's turn to play..

it was about quarter to midnight when almost all the teams decided to leave the court..
after leaving the court.. they join the couple and the girl that i saw before..
can you imagine that?
its about 9 guys. and 2 girls. in the dark!
just think about risk of the girls getting raped by those guys for a sec.

i'm not saying that those guys are bad boys..

but girls.. please.. use your brain.. its dangerous.. no matter who the guys are..

love yourselves.. please..

the law of garbage truck

2009-12-09T11:07:00.000-08:00

i got this story from one of my classmate.. i just want to share it..

How often do you let other people’s nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? Unless you’re the Terminator, you’re probably set back on your heels. However, the mark of your success is how quickly you can refocus on what’s important in your life.

Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. And I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here’s what happened.

I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, the car skidded, the tires squealed, and at the very last moment our car stopped just one inch from the other car’s back-end.

I couldn’t believe it. But then I couldn’t believe what happened next. The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. How do I know? Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face. And he even threw in a one finger salute! I couldn’t believe it!

But then here’s what really blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, “Why did you just do that!? This guy could have killed us!” And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, “The Law of the Garbage Truck™.” He said:

Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they look for a place to dump it. And if you let them, they’ll dump it on you.

So when someone wants to dump on you, don’t take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Believe me. You’ll be happier.

So I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the street? It was then that I said, “I don’t want their garbage and I’m not going to spread it anymore.”

I began to see Garbage Trucks. Like in the movie “The Sixth Sense,” the little boy said, “I see Dead People.” Well now “I see Garbage Trucks.” I see the load they’re carrying. I see them coming to dump it. And like my taxi driver, I don’t take it personally; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on.

One of my favorite football players of all time was Walter Payton. Every day on the football field, after being tackled, he would jump up as quickly as he hit the ground. He never dwelled on a hit. Payton was ready to make the next play his best. Over the years the best players from around the world in every sport have played this way: Tiger Woods, Nadia Comaneci, Muhammad Ali, Bjorn Borg, Chris Evert, Michael Jordan, Jackie Robinson, and Pele are just some of those players. And the most inspiring leaders have lived this way: Nelson Mandela, Mother Theresa, Ghandi, and Martin Luther King.

See, Roy Baumeister, a psychology researcher from the University of Florida, found in his extensive research that you remember bad things more often than good things in your life. You store the bad memories more easily, and you recall them more frequently.

So the odds are against you when a Garbage Truck comes your way. But when you follow The Law of the Garbage Truck™, you take back control of your life. You make room for the good by letting go of the bad.

The best leaders know that they have to be ready for their next meeting. The best sales people know that they have to be ready for their next client. And the best parents know that they have to be ready to welcome their children home from school with hugs and kisses, no matter how many garbage trucks they might have faced that day. All of us know that we have to be fully present, and at our best for the people we care about.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their life.

What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by?

Here’s my bet: You’ll be happier.

LOVE THE PEOPLE WHO TREAT U WELL.. AND WISH THOSE WHO DON'T TO DO WELL

u can criticise but dont ever judge

2009-12-01T07:40:00.000-08:00

kite slalu dgr org ckp bile tgk org yg pakaiannye kurang elok(tk tutup aurat ect)

"tk bgs btl la die tu, jgn kawan ngan die"

mmg btl die slah bab jge aurat.. tp slh die cume satu je yg kite tau.. yg pegi sng2 ckp org tu tak baik ko kenapa??

klu org tu qiam tiap2 malam ko ade tau? sure ko ckp "dh pki cmtu tkde qiam nye.."

ko sure ke?

tu dh kire brsangke buruk ko tau.. mne gi sifat mahmudah ko??

n even klu btl pn die tk qiam.. ko yg qiam ni syurge ko punye??

ko sure sgt solat ko diterime??

igt bhai.. masuk syurge bkn dgn solat.. tp ngn rahmat allah..

klu btl ko hbt pn.. hfz 30 juzuk pn.. jd tk gne a..

islam utk diamal.. islam tu syumul..

tp klu ko amik bab qiam ngn hafazan ngn tutup aurat je tu maslah ko..

repair tu dulu..

aku nk puji a ape yg ko dh bwt.. tp yg ko blum bwt tu ak nk tgo a..

klu care aku tgor cm kasar aku mintk maaf a..

ak agk sensitif hal ni.. hrp ko maafkn aku a..

bkn aku k ckp yg ko tk bole tgo org klu ko tk perfect.. sume pn tk perfect, tu aku tau..

ape yg ak nk tgo kt sini ko JGN JUDGE .. please..KRITIK TKPE.. slh die kt bab tu sntuh bab tu je.. jgn ngade2 nk ckp die sejengkal dari nerake bagai..

ko dpt ank cmtu br ko tau..

tp ak doakan tk a..

*nauzubillah

*ni bkn cite psl sape2

**igtn ni utk aku dn sume org yg ske judge org..

i learned this on a football pitch

2009-12-01T07:19:00.000-08:00

it was just an ordinary evening.. a huge difference is the players: 2 notorious players came to tag along.. no one expect it to be a good game.. those 2 are brilliant player.. but well known for their behaviors.. there's no need to mention about those.. i said to myself 'it won't be a fun game today with these 2 on the pitch' straight to the point,this is what I've learned: NEVER EVER CONCLUDE ABOUT ANYONE AFTER SEEING JUST 1 THING.. some of yall might prefer ' never judge a book by its cover'

yea its true they are not the type of boys that you would call good.. but playing wit them is a joy.. but that joy does not come easy.. as they do not play with the style i prefer.. what i did was TRIED TO UNDERSTAND THEM.. what kind of passes the will play.. what kind of passes they want..

then i played those passes.. i made myself available for their kind of passes.. although i does not feel comfortable doing it.. but it worked.. goals was scored.. he got the passes he wants.. although i don't get my type of passes, but at least i was not ignored.. and even when i did a few bad call, they forgive me.. coz they have reason to..

now just think what would happen if i did not tolerate?

i make mistakes too

2009-12-01T07:01:00.000-08:00

the title tells how imperfect i am.. sumtime it frustrates me.. badly.. not the fact that i'm not perfect, but the fact that i replicate the same imperfections time n time again.. feel like a big looser coz after all the rahmat from god is re payed by mistakes n imperfections.. but 'never ever give up on allah's rahmat'.. so i guess that the best that should be done.. keep hoping.. keep praying.. keep trying..